Posting a quiz on your blog and having your friends take it is in honor of my friend Tim Suttle. So click to this quiz (it's not the best one I've seen, but it will do) and let me know what you are in the form of a comment. I studied the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator in grad. school and find it fascinating. David and I have been able to figure out why we disagree by looking at how we differ on this test. We've both taken the 250+ question version and been debriefed by a professional. If you have taken this several times at least look through it again...you may know yourself better now. I used to score as slightly F but have been a T for the past few years. This might have to do with the fact that David is so F that I feel the need to balance him out and be rational. :)
QUIZ
Below is some info. about me...
How to Love an INTJ
Be an attentive and respectful listener.
Appreciate my competency and creativity.
Give me plenty of privacy and time alone for me to pursue my interests in depth.
Try not to pressure me to share my feelings before I'm ready.
Be honest and direct about what you need.
Above all - respect my independence and need to live my life according to my own standards.
How to Spot INTJs:
cool, formal and independent
intellectual, logical, and skeptical
complex, and challenging with a sometimes superior attitude
conservative dressers with an individual look
Tips for Communicating with INTJs:
Appeal to their creativity and innovation
Base your arguments on logical reasoning
Be organized and avoid errors that undermine your competence
Monday, April 30, 2007
New Life Live
I highly recommend the radio program "New Life Live" on each day at 1pm Central. It is Christian therapists that answer callers questions about life, relationships, and troubles. All of you counseling buddies would love it. Henry Cloud, John Townsend, Steve Arteburn, Jill Hubbard are a few of the therapist on there. Tune in with me, and we will analyze all the callers later in the afternoon via e-mail.
Saturday, April 28, 2007
Strange
It is a little strange to have a son that looks exactly like me. Sometimes I look at him and have to do a doubletake to make sure he isn't me. He looks exactly like my dad, my youngest brother, aunt, and I. And let's face it my dad, brother, aunt, and I all look exactly the same too. Genes...fascinating.
Questions, Comments, and Doubts
We attended our church marriage retreat this weekend, and I've spent the past few hours reflecting (while also feeding T, folding clothes, and watching 'Troop Beverly Hills' and 'School of Rock) on some of the things the speaker in our videos said. See what you think about the following stuff and post a comment.
1. Mutual submission---The speaker said that if one spouse chooses to simply submit to the other and "cast their anxieties on God" as they wait for the other person to start submitting as well then things will eventually work out "in due time." I agree with this in theory but only if the other person shows at least small signs of willingness to grow/work on themselves/submit too. It also would only work if both people are physically and emotionally safe in the relationship. If there is any piece of either partner that is unsafe then much more would need to be done in addition to "casting anxieties on God" including setting boundaries. All in all, I think submission only works if it is 100% mutual. Otherwise, one partner loses themselves as they struggle to love and serve someone that continues to hurt them. I just don't think my divorced friends who gave their husbands or wives years of "due time" waiting for them to submit in return would buy the whole idea that it would eventually work out if they kept on waiting in an emotionally unsafe relationship.
2. The speaker said God cares about all of our desires. I agree. BUT God also wants our hearts to beat like His, and He doesn't show any evidence in His Word of wanting some of the things I want. For example, if my greatest desire is a million dollar home (which it isn't---I can't even keep our current home clean) I can pray and pray and pray for God to give it to me, but I don't think million dollar homes are something His heart beats for.
3. David and I have come to the conclusion recently that marriage is kind of a crap shoot. Some marriages work and some simply don't. We got married really young before we knew each other or ourselves and got lucky. Lucky meaning that we were both willing to go through the ringer for a few years to figure a bunch of stuff out about each other and ourselves. It wasn't pretty (and still isn't some of the time) but we were both WILLING to do it. The crap shoot is taking the chance that the other is willing to work on themselves and that you have the courage to look at yourself and see your own shit and fix it. I don't think God loves us any more because our marriage happens to work than our friends whose marriages didn't work out.
This is my longest post ever. What do you all think?
1. Mutual submission---The speaker said that if one spouse chooses to simply submit to the other and "cast their anxieties on God" as they wait for the other person to start submitting as well then things will eventually work out "in due time." I agree with this in theory but only if the other person shows at least small signs of willingness to grow/work on themselves/submit too. It also would only work if both people are physically and emotionally safe in the relationship. If there is any piece of either partner that is unsafe then much more would need to be done in addition to "casting anxieties on God" including setting boundaries. All in all, I think submission only works if it is 100% mutual. Otherwise, one partner loses themselves as they struggle to love and serve someone that continues to hurt them. I just don't think my divorced friends who gave their husbands or wives years of "due time" waiting for them to submit in return would buy the whole idea that it would eventually work out if they kept on waiting in an emotionally unsafe relationship.
2. The speaker said God cares about all of our desires. I agree. BUT God also wants our hearts to beat like His, and He doesn't show any evidence in His Word of wanting some of the things I want. For example, if my greatest desire is a million dollar home (which it isn't---I can't even keep our current home clean) I can pray and pray and pray for God to give it to me, but I don't think million dollar homes are something His heart beats for.
3. David and I have come to the conclusion recently that marriage is kind of a crap shoot. Some marriages work and some simply don't. We got married really young before we knew each other or ourselves and got lucky. Lucky meaning that we were both willing to go through the ringer for a few years to figure a bunch of stuff out about each other and ourselves. It wasn't pretty (and still isn't some of the time) but we were both WILLING to do it. The crap shoot is taking the chance that the other is willing to work on themselves and that you have the courage to look at yourself and see your own shit and fix it. I don't think God loves us any more because our marriage happens to work than our friends whose marriages didn't work out.
This is my longest post ever. What do you all think?
Thursday, April 26, 2007
10!
Most of you know by now that I am pretty open with the whole weight/body image stuff. I just wanted to report that I am now officially in a size 10! All size 10s are now zipping up and even a little loose. This is very exciting as I have worked pretty hard to get to this point. While a 10 is still a pretty far cry from the 4s hanging in my closet from pre-pregnancy, I'll take it! One step at a time...On Thomas' first birthday I'll probably also be throwing a party titled "Yea Adrienne Got All Her Baby Weight Off!"
You guys can all come celebrate with me...
You guys can all come celebrate with me...
All Around Girl
Ok so I have been around quite a few women lately that feel like they cannot have a seperate identity from their kids. Here comes the word vommit (to quote Kate from The Bachelor) on this topic...Please don't let me be like this! I love people, counseling, my husband, creativity, basketball, Desperate Housewives, social justice, adoption, ice cream, solitude, jewelry, talk radio, exercise classes, AND Thomas. I am a whole person and while I know I will have to sacrifice different parts of myself at different times during my children's lives I will not simply be a mom who doesn't know any other sides of her multi-faceted personality.
Along the same lines...It is becoming more and more clear after some opened and closed doors that I may be going back to school to train to be a professor/counselor at the university level. I want to stay at home and serve my family part-time, but I know there is also an intellectual and academic leadership side to me that is currently missing. David and my parents are in full support and will be part of Thomas' village for the next several years. We will raise him as a team. I'm very excited about this possibility on many levels...please hope for me that it either works out or that I have a clear sense about what is next along with being a mom.
Along the same lines...It is becoming more and more clear after some opened and closed doors that I may be going back to school to train to be a professor/counselor at the university level. I want to stay at home and serve my family part-time, but I know there is also an intellectual and academic leadership side to me that is currently missing. David and my parents are in full support and will be part of Thomas' village for the next several years. We will raise him as a team. I'm very excited about this possibility on many levels...please hope for me that it either works out or that I have a clear sense about what is next along with being a mom.
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